November 1, 2016 (morning thoughts)


I overhear people on the street, in every conversation, expressing “Where has this year gone?” and soon New Years will be upon them and they will start all over again. Another year, 2017, to find themselves  expressing regret, if it is regret.

I know each day passes by.
I know life is fleeting.
Some days I pray
day becomes wind,
blowing away and blowing in.  J.

What catches us off guard to days passing? What is it I want to do with my days that I let pass by, that I have not done? Once upon a time, afflicted with debilitating grief, depression and anxiety took over my mind. Soldiers of dark they were and yet I held on to them as dear friends, who helped relieve guilt of things unsaid and love held back.

It was stolen. As most beautiful things eventually are.”
–J.J. Abrams, S.

I believe it is the relationships never forged, to move beyond hello, that we regret. We long to find a soul who understands us completely. At least I do. How often rejection becomes the sole wall we never conquer. Fear strikes the most formidable person of courage. It is fear that makes love obsolete.

where has love gone
hiding behind faces
afraid to interact
made fun of, rejected?

how else are we ever to understand
the mind of another
if we do not extend hearts and hands
express our need to utter?

words, why worry?
Depression and Anxiety twins.
Twins playing tricks
with no treats, no win.   J.

No doubt there is much to worry about. The question becomes how to control what we can so we reap fruitful rewards.

When we are released from the mind’s demon, we see the world from a fresh perspective and wonder what next. What beautiful thing exists around the bend?

***

My thoughts this morning as I approach the day. Will I ever understand knowing there is much to comprehend? I, a pot on a potter’s wheel, broken and mended, rearranged and defended against the pain of the world.

Keep searching. This is what I pray for today. So easily rejected. So easily to reach out again. No matter how I might find myself yearning to be safe in the dark again, a place of comfort I knew and know so well, I keep fighting.

I look forward to reading J.J. Abrams book, “S.”

 

2 thoughts on “November 1, 2016 (morning thoughts)

    1. Oh! Hope it is a positive direction to take. Today, I feel less regret, only stronger to move on. Learn fear is what holds me back. Too dependent on others, testing my wing’s resolve. May all be well with you. 💛💜🌾💚💙

      Liked by 1 person

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