As March 1 draws near, emotions bubble to the top. Mostly anger. Then guilt. I rotate through the grief process every year. Denial passed over. The event all too familiar and real.
I think. I thought.
Shouldn’t i be well
by now
the pain of missing you
not seeing your smile
hearing the loving words
from your mouth -voices
ridicule my rest from the tragedy
climbing down the mountain
i scream, it should have been me!
What a mistake
to be happy
climbing
back up the mountain
year after year. Again and again.
Realizing in a year
the steep decline,
a familiar path,
has no net.
But you felt better,
decided to join society,
well meaning people chime. Again and again.
Who can understand this pain?
seasons: a poetic journey 
More people you probably think/thought 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
Unfortunately. 💙🕊
LikeLiked by 1 person
Indeed. Therefore, I am glad you are also breaking the taboo and share your story. It will help other to feel not alone 😉
LikeLike
❤️
LikeLiked by 1 person
💙🕊🎶🎶
LikeLiked by 1 person
Love to you, Sweet Jeanne
LikeLiked by 1 person
This hit me, especially today. Suicide such old friend that continues to tempt…….
LikeLike
Oh no, no, no, no, no! 💙🕊
LikeLiked by 1 person
I get those thoughts too Manuel. I pray they are fleeting for you too! 💙🕊
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you for having me in your prayers. I will be ok, thankfully I have the words, they never leave, they are always with me, regardless.
LikeLiked by 1 person
And strangely, i have wanted to die since 3rd grade. If you ever want, please email me. promisegardens@att.net
I am always available. Always. My brother was more worried about me that i never realized he was struggling behind his smile. 😥💔
LikeLiked by 1 person
(hugs)
LikeLiked by 1 person
Now i can officially add you to my kindest men log!! 🤗💙🕊🎶🎶
LikeLiked by 1 person