Courting My Heart

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I learned to love to paint. My hands trembled the first time I picked up the brush. The lack of color left my thoughts white and afraid to be coated. Today, as always, I question what my paint palette should be. I wonder what color fancies my heart?

I once dreamed of names for my children in high school, thinking of a man I would marry. So why can I not decide today, what color suits my mind? Does not Calvin weave water into ice cubes and Raina forever lick salt from frothy cheeks? Then my heart should beat blue and spill red.

“Color directly influences the soul. Color is the keyboard, the eyes are the hammers, the soul is the piano with many strings. The artist is the hand that plays, touching one key or another purposely, to cause vibrations in the soul.”
Wassily Kandinsky, Concerning the Spiritual in Art

As I watch a day progress to the blackness of mourning,
I sit trembling
horsehair brush in hand
tickling my heart with story
and dreaming of my friend.

 

 

 

Origins

the-dance-of-life
The dance of life -Edvard Munch 1899-1900

Since the beginning of time
man yearned to hold
bare hands grabbing the void.
Who knows where thoughts descend
knowledge within himself?
boulders resting on shoulders.

Rocks for sitting and moving and groaning
time expanding and growing, infinitely exploding.

Plans from a power unseen
acknowledging humanity’s innocence green
contemplating our enemies.
Oral stories spread through the land
From where did they come?
the dance of life moving on.

Time between legs inspiring
tucked between the ways of seeing
inquisitive symbols depart thoughts.
Creating in white, red and black
why discovery depicted in painting?
determined to be so clear.

Rocks for sitting and moving and groaning
time expanding and growing, infinitely exploding.

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Molecules strung together
like spun sugar.
Licking her lips, anticipation.
A rocky start to a great marriage.

Craggy coastline
of her figure
Pock marks from all the jabs.
Time has a way to weigh her down.

i do

Forgiveness moves obstacles away;
resolute duty brings purpose,
radical hope brings beauty,
promised love brings sacrifice.

in other words…

your eyes brighten skies;
swiftly tilting sea legs
on the horizon shows
our future endeavors grow.